I know that I am a year late literally on this but I am shocked and sad that James Naughton aka Erik Rhode( 30 years old) is dead (HEART ATTACK). He was a gay pornstar I used to talk to him online and offline we would go back and forth he would talk about things I did not understand (his life with money, people and etc) because he was so good looking very honest and he didn't give a shit what people thought he kept doing his thing. He had the best body I have ever seen on someone with a tall frame since IFBB pro Christian Duffy ( Who was also a pornstar) and had the same sadness and the same drug problem. I saw him one day on the Upper East side in Manhattan one winter and I stopped him and said " I know you and I love your fashion photos." He smiled at me and said " I guess you haven't seen any of my movies have you?" I said no but I know who you are?" But I like the fashion photos you did for major stores and the daring shots you took with wonderland that you posted on myspace. Then he said thanks for that... for recognizing something other than a fist up my ass. I was laughing so hard because he said that with a serious face. He was really sad and it seemed to me that he was waiting to die. The depression was so bad at times I began to cry when I read his blogs about how he hated certain situations in his life and how his issues with drugs would never leave him. He told me that he was from Manorville and he had to get out of there because he felt trapped and no one understood him and at one point he wanted to be a cop state trooper I believe and instead he became a dancer for a short while because the money was great. Then he talked about he was once with a woman for what he considers a longtime in his life and then he realized he had to do something different. He was the reason why I loved NINE INCH NAILS... The song Discipline opened me up completely and removed the cob webs from my brain. He made see that people do what they do and judgment by a human being is bullshit.
We used to talk a lot and then we stopped talking......... I didn't know he was dead until yesterday when I was talking to a friend and his name came up. I got curious and looked him up and found he died. The last time I spoke to him he was living in STATEN ISLAND with his boyfriend and then after that relationship we never spoke again because he was happy for a short bit but it wasn't enough. I cant say.... and I am drawing at straws here.... After talking to him for two years ..... I don't think he was happy doing porn ( That's just me talking) He wanted to be a model doing mens fashion like the top names of today MICHAEL CORS, TOM FORD and etc. He wanted to be recognized in the FASHION WORLD. People only wanted to be around him because he is the hot guy with the big dick as he always said. He said that everyone wanted to fuck him and some wanted to take care of him and it gets old after a while. I learned so much from him as far as " People are not attached to you by accident.. someone always wants something regardless. I wish I had more time with him but there was nothing anyone could do for him honestly. He was in so much pain and suffering for years and people that he was mean and sarcastic but he was actually sweet and he talked to me like a regular person he wasn't phased by fame or fortune. I called him the unhappy handsome.. Rest in Peace James and I will never forget you for changing my mind of missing out on life and to stop being judgmental.
Just to tell you know He was tall and handsome... He looked 1 million times better than his photos. I just wished that he could have lived longer to get the opportunity to do the things he wanted to do outside of porn. He was such a cool guy honestly. FYI to be honest I never believed he was gay until he moved in with the last boyfriend he was with STATEN ISLAND. The way he acted to me.. He acted like a straight man... The signals were never there that he was gay and for some reason I still don't believe he is gay at all. I think he may have been bisexual.. but the way he talked and acted he was definitely alpha male 100%. I cant explain it, but he didn't have feminine bone in his body. He loved his beer and he loved his music. I wish we could talk again.
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